Helping kids through stress when they don't know how to express the words

 

Tip: Create a Stress Jar

How to:
Any jar will do.
Put labels on rocks, poker chips, or any small flat objects with words like angry, sad, tired, hungry, confused, scared, or even "not sure".  You may need to add them as new emotions come up.

When your child expresses stress and has a difficult time understanding how to handle it, or knowing what to do with it, ask them to find their feeling from the stress jar and pick a rock.  Sit down or walk it out to try deal with it together.

Parents/adults can:

Be calm and patient

Empathize but don't excuse the behavior:  "It sounds like you had a rough day when you were left out at the lunch table."

Attack the behavior not the child: "How do you think others feel when your tone is not nice?"

Discuss problem solving techniques: "How do you think you could handle a situation like this in a more positive way in the future?"

Use positive reinforcement when you notice improvement.  " I am very proud of you how you handled that disagreement with your friend."